She also warns against using numbing creams. Finn says anal sex should never hurt or feel uncomfortable.
Communication is key.Īnd if something hurts, stop. Let your partner know what feels good, what doesn’t, and what sensations you’d like to explore further. If you’re with a partner, Finn suggests asking them to stimulate the area with their tongue or give you a relaxing full-body massage before making any other moves.
The external stimulation alone may feel great, so you can leave it at that, or continue to relax as you work your way up to penetration. You can start by stimulating the outside of your anus with your fingers or a vibrating toy. So if you’re feeling a bit anxious about anal play, those muscles may not be as willing to open to allow for penetration.” “We naturally tense up when something new is introduced to that area. “The rectum holds a lot of tension,” she tells SELF. Lisa Finn, a sex educator at the sex toy boutique Babeland, says relaxation is key to enjoying anal play. When you’re going to try the big A, experts recommend taking it slow and starting with a little finger or mouth play.
